bethenny frankel on “a place of yes”

Whatever you think of The Real Housewives, you have to admire Bethenny Frankel, who went on to have her own reality show, Bethenny Ever After, was first runner-up on The Apprentice: Martha Stewart and was voted into the finalist spot on Skating with the Stars. She now takes on the role of life coach, sharing her secrets for success in her new book, A Place of Yes: 10 Rules for Getting Everything You Want Out of Life. After reading it, I had a bunch of questions for her, which she answered with her usual no-nonsense directness. Yes, indeed!

I love the idea of “A Place of Yes,” and think it’s so empowering. Can you talk a little about how you came up with that idea and how you reached that place yourself?

What it isn’t is always being in a good mood. What it is is how to get what you want out of your life — whatever that may be. The concept evolved in my life as I kept hearing “no” and kept persevering to turn “no” into “yes.”

Can you explain why coming from “A Place of Yes” isn’t really the same as being an optimist?

I’m not always in a good mood or agreeable. “A place of yes” is saying I can make whatever I want happen if I know in my gut that it’s possible.

You offer “10 Rules for Getting Everything You Want Out of Life” in this book. Is there one rule that’s still challenging for you personally?

“Come together” is a rule about coming together in work and in relationships — basically in any area of your life where working together makes a situation better. Being an only child and very independent has made this rule more challenging than others, yet more rewarding.

Why do you think women relate to you so strongly?

I put it all out there, warts and all. You don’t have to love everything I do, but you will always know it’s the truth.

What kinds of questions do women write to you about? What do they most want to know or learn – both about you personally and about how to handle certain issues?

Women write to me about everything but mostly about how they’re inspired to go for more than they ever dreamed they could.

I think you nail it when you talk about the “noise” that holds women back from getting what they want. Tell us a little about that.

We all have our demons in different areas of our lives that hold us back. We need to turn those demons into possibilities.

What do you consider your greatest success? What accomplishment are you most proud of?

My greatest personal success is my family. Professionally, A Place of Yes is by far my greatest accomplishment.

What was the biggest obstacle you had to overcome to achieve that?

It was difficult to dig deep and really delve into my life and turn that into rules that people could take away and apply to their own lives

How did you become profitable at everything you did, from pashminas to “lazy lingerie” to Skinnygirl Margaritas?

My entire brand is about problem-solving for women. When you adhere to a line and know who you are and what you stand for, it comes easily.

How did having a baby change your life – and your perception of life?

Having a baby makes you realize that very little else really matters.

You are definitely living proof that your “10 Rules” work. You’ve done everything from writing three New York Times bestsellers to starring in your own reality show and spinoff. What’s still on your bucket list?

I take things day by day. As I say in my book, “all roads lead to Rome.”